If 1.2 million dildos are sold every year, then landfills are bristling with dildos
Has there ever been an heirloom dildo?
I wonder how many millions of people are using dildos at this very moment
If there was a dildo based on my penis, would that be like a movie based on my book?
Nobody really knows where the word dildo came from
The only thing that dildo rhymes with is Bilbo, which must have annoyed J.R.R Tolkien
Why do I write?
Honestly, I think I’d rather be selling dildos
Door to Door Dildos, by Aaron Louis Asselstine
And my tagline will be, Poking fun at yourself has never been easier!
Polyvinyl dildos, rubber dildos, mahogany dildos, steel dildos, glass dildos, chrome plated dildos, borosilicate dildos, Cyberskin® dildos, Hello Kitty® dildos, My Little Pony® dildos, wolf’s penis dildos, white dildos, black dildos, yellow dildos, red dildos, blue dildos, green dildos: biodegradable dildos