The Burgermeister

“TELEPHONE!”One eye was caked with mucus and the other, glued to the pillowcase. I knew that if I tried to lift my head, it would fall off. Death! Give me Death.“Tell whoever it is to call back.”“Ist Oncle Boob! Ach! Wino! You stink!”“Who do you think you are? Meine Mutti? Go away!”“Nein. Telephone. Ist Oncle […]

I’ll probably delete this when sober …

Rytan’s laptop began to act as though she’d clicked on one of those endless commercials for adult diapers that kept spinning you through the interverse until, unless you signed up for monthly delivery service, bladder leakage insurance for your jumpers, and a six-month subscription to their toilet tips podcasts, your device would explode. She snapped […]


This is episode whatever (I’ve lost count) of Returning to the Pits of Meaningless Despair. She wasn’t responsible for the earthquake, or for the fact that a section of the Bay Bridge had collapsed, but Brandy felt compelled to apologize anyway. “I’m sorry we have to go the long way but at least the Golden […]

A damn fine book

Way back in 2014, Duke, Aaron, and I were told by our publisher that if we didn’t scrounge up at least 35 five star reviews by our book release date we might as well just give up, go home and drown our sorrows in bourbon. I’m sure that’s good sound advice but it did lead […]

I thought you’d want to know

The first thing that caught her eye were his shoes. Although they’d been rigorously polished for the interview, they had no style. They were generic, lace-up, coal-black, rubber-bottomed shoes of the type you’d see on people in mental institutions. And he stuck them out in front of his body and towards the camera making his […]

Many paths, one door

“There are many paths but only one door.” Nora finally had a car that she’d chosen and not been given out of pity. The reason was Blackjack. She had a knack for shuffling and dealing … and a head for numbers which the casinos rewarded far better than accounting firms. So, with her first big […]

Wasted Space

Nora continued spreading the cream cheese topping, the butter knife skating across the surface as though she was trying to create perfect waves on a frothy sea. She could take a fountain pen, a few dabs of watercolor and, with those acrobatic fingers, create a masterpiece. But studying art at the university had soured her […]

Charades, Part 2

The groom’s parents had generously bought the newlyweds a place to live, Chad explained as they drove further and further northeast of Reno. “How far out is this Sunrise Estates?”  Brandy asked.   “Remember Stead?”  “The old air force base?” But, it’s brand new housing, Chad said, and soon it will be a lovely family […]

Charades, Part 1

This is a continuation of Returning to the Pits of Meaningless Despair. “Praise the Lord. I’ve found you!”  She looked up from a paperback she’d been pretending to read and there stood Chad. He was no longer the long-legged boy she remembered but still seemed on the edge of evaporating into another world. When she’d […]

Returning to the Pits of Meaningless Despair

“Expect some turbulence,” the pilot announced as the plane drifted over the snow topped peaks and began to glide through the canyon.  On her lap she held a copy of the SF Chronicle.  A man and woman, only in their twenties, had been attacked by an intruder to their rooftop flat.  Both were bound and […]